Ten people you should unfollow on social media

Faced with a captive audience, a blinking cursor, and the pseudo-anonymity of 500 Facebook friends, even well-adjusted people can spiral into panicked outbursts. Which is the only way to explain the raving insanity that gets posted on a daily basis.

That doesn't mean you have to put up with it. Going through your bloated friends list to eject the worst offenders is both mighty satisfying and beneficial to your mental health.

To help you get started, here are the 10 of people you'll encounter on social media who need to go.

The 'political experts'

There's a time and a place to discuss politics. People who screech about their preferred candidate's bona-fides while labelling anyone who disagrees with them a mindless thug are both tedious, and impossible to engage with. When 'facts' and 'reality' get swept aside in order to make-a-point you've devolved into student politics. Unfollow.

The aggressively spiritual

These self-help gurus are as transparent as their morning cup of hot water with lemon. Anyone who's satisfied with their life probably doesn't need to post aggressive self-affirmations about it on a daily basis. Real happiness means getting on with it, and doesn't require a 24-hour news cycle of hyper spirituality, chakras, and inspirational quotes clogging up the Internet. Unfollow.

The vaguely distressed

What's that? Something terrible has happened? You're having the worst day? You can't believe he/she did that to you? Unless there are some corresponding details, this is known as 'vague-booking', and is the start of endless "Is everything okay babe?" posts from people who should know better by now. It's embarrassing for all concerned. Unfollow.

The random strangers

Who are these people? Why are they on your feed? Why are they posting photos of their ugly baby? Can we tell them their baby is ugly? Is that 'wrong'? Unfollow.

The religious relatives

At some point Facebook saw a wave of parents and relatives jump on board to spoil the fun and write embarrassing comments on your party pics. While you'd have to be a cold-hearted monster to deny your mother's friend request, no one needs to put up with a distant relative's fire and brimstones interpretation of the Old Testament, and their associated thoughts on 'gays', 'halal', and Jesus. Unfollow.

The people who just discovered memes

We all like the occasional cat photo, screaming goat video, or that cockatoo on YouTube that swears like a sailor. But when your feed becomes inundated with tired memes cut and pasted from Buzzfeed, you have to wonder about the people responsible, and what they do with themselves all day. Besides which, we've already seen these. Unfollow.


The lazy activists

We get it; the world is in trouble, people are suffering, and we MUST TAKE ACTION NOW. But there's only so much empathy to go around, and this isn't a contest. The people who change their profile pic to commemorate fashionable international tragedies and spam your feed with dubious stories from shady websites are not interested in facts or solutions – they're metaphorically clutching their pearls. Unfollow.

The casual racists

If the election results are to be believed, a small but vocal minority feels that the greatest threat to this country are refugees stealing their jobs or foreigners buying up all the houses. It's a free country, and people are entitled to their opinion, but that doesn't mean you have to listen to them. Unfollow.

The conspiracy nuts

Let's dismiss several hundred years of scientific research because someone with a blog claims that vaccines cause autism, fluoride is government plot to subdue the population, and chem trails are a "real thing." Logic and evidence have no place in these people's world view, and arguing with them is an exercise in futility. Be kind to your blood pressure. Unfollow.

The people who whinge about their job

One day the boss is going to stumble across their rants and the person responsible will be marched out of the building. Until that happens we have limited interest in the daily routine of Doug from accounts and how he manages to drive you nuts by not refilling the coffee beans or whatever perceived slight has got you hitting caps lock. UNFOLLOW.

Who have we missed? Let us know who needs to go from your social media feed in the Comments section.